The wonders of Saturday
by Apheria
Summary: Dante, Vergil and Trish living together. Mundus is trying to tunnel up to the human world with his super sidekick, Jester, will the twins be able to stop this madness? Chap. 3 up! Church themes Please read the warning! Rating raised to M... My first fanfi
1. Welcome to the Sparda residence

Disclaimer: I do not own Devil May Cry or Vergil -nods sadly-, and unfortunately I'm not in possession of any pancakes either. -sob-

Warning: Some language due to Vergil's anger and Jester's idiocy. It's not too bad though. Oh and please bear with the grammar. I've been away from school on the account of surgery so I've missed lots of English classes!

Summary: Dante, Vergil and Trish living together. Mundus is trying to tunnel up to the human world with his super sidekick, Jester -shudders- and a fight to the death over pancakes! My first fanfic. Dante needed a place to stash his weed (just kidding. But...), beer and pizza, and is quite lazy because he couldn't be bothered getting off his butt to find a place to crash, Vergil had a reputation of being a murderous little bastard and couldn't rent a house due to the fact that the residents were always complaining about the amount of blood and, well Trish, she just shows up and pays the bills for the usage of Devil May Cry. How convenient for the boys.

The wonders of Saturday

By Apheria

Chapter One: Welcome to the Sparda residence

On an unusual Saturday morning Dante would be doing work or reading the paper for a job, Vergil would be drunk and chasing seagulls and Trish wouldn't be annoying. But this was anywhere from unusual. This was a usual Saturday morning. Crashes could be heard from the kitchen of the little apartment behind Devil May Cry, no doubt that the crashes were made by either Dante or Vergil, fighting over the last pancake and spilling most of Dante's beer while they were doing so. Trish was happily cleaning the place while listening to chicky shit music on her Discman and best of all there was no sight of that deranged homosexual clown. Yes. It was a beautiful, usual Saturday morning. Oh, the wonders of Saturday.

Whining could be herd from the kitchen now as Vergil walked out eating the last of the pancake with a sulky Dante following behind.

"Why do you _always_ get the last pancake? It's not fair Vergil!"

Vergil turned to look at his brother, "It's not my fault you're weak," he said licking the syrup off his fingers "besides, I deserve it more."

"But it's not _fair!_"

"Shut up"

"Why?"

"Cause you're stupid."

"I'm not stupid! I have smarts!"

"Stupid."

"I'm not stupid!"

"Just go away."

"Why?"

"Cause you're stupid."

Now this would have gone on all day if it wasn't for Trish hearing the argument and coming over to break it up. She knew that it would have ended in two ways; Dante hurt or Dante dead and she didn't want to have to clean her carpet twice today.

"Alright! That's enough you two! Break it up!"

"Trish!" Dante said in his oh-so-whiny voice that he had just used on Vergil, "Just when I was winning! You're no fair!"

"You weren't winning Dante, and if I hadn't saved you're arse right now Vergil would have broken every bone in your body, even _you_ know that."

"But he STOLE the last pancake!"

Vergil laughed.

"What's so funny Mr-I'm-so-high-and-mighty?" Dante crossed his arms and looked at Vergil.

"Stole? Me?" Vergil laughed again, "You just don't get it brother. I'm _stronger_ than you. Stealing is for weak, stupid idiots like you."

"What did you call me!"

"You heard"

"GAHHHHHH!"

With that Dante attempted to tackle his brother and completely missed while Vergil drew his Yamato and struck him in the shoulder blade. This made Dante react and before Trish could break the brotherly love up for the second time, the twins were both in D.T.

It looked like Trish _would_ have to clean the house twice today on this oh-so normal Saturday.

Meanwhile in a part of hell we call the Demon Realm...

A dark figure was sitting on a magnificent throne of boxes and planks, watching his little demon minions working on a plan to rule the upper world. Just then a voice interrupted his train of thoughts.

"Oh Maaasteeeeeeerrr!"

The figure remained quiet.

"Oh Lord Mundus,"

No reply.

"Oi! Devil Man!"

"What is it Jester?" This time the dark and oh-so eerie figure known as Mundus arose from his throne of broken cardboard and boxes. (Hey when a half-breed kicks your arse so badly and sends you back into the depths of hell, you don't have time to mail-order a new throne. Besides he had no money and it was clearly labelled on the pamphlet "we do not accept souls". Not that Mundus had tried that or anything...)

"Well your lordship, the almighty amazing, ever powerful, beautiful, evi-"

"Get to the point Jester!" _Wait... Beautiful? What the hell! That's not cool. He just called me beautiful. Maybe he IS homosexual..._

"Well your scariness, we have found a way to tunnel up to the human world." Jester paused, "but you have to be quick other wise you will be stuck in here forever and ever andneverevergettohavetherevengeyoualwayswanted!"

"Sure... I'll take that into mind... DISMISSED!" and with that, Mundus slouched back on his throne with very sore ears.

Back at the Sparda residence...

An angry Trish was cleaning up the remains of what had turned into a competition to see who could drink the most beer. It all started when Dante had called Vergil fat. This didn't sit to well with Vergil who pointed out that they were _identical _twins. Dante being well... Dante, took this the wrong way and after insults being thrown back and forward between the two, Dante challenged Vergil to a beer drinking competition.

Now, the thought of drinking that liquid substance that made humans do weird things didn't exactly appeal to Vergil at all. He even detested the idea of going near the stuff, but when Dante sets a challenge, Vergil wasn't going to let his brother know that he found it disgusting. In fact, Vergil won and this left Trish cleaning out all the beer stains in the carpet that Dante had made when he tried to shove Vergil's beer can down his brother's throat. Trish was quite surprised at how neatly Vergil drank. He was just taking nice little sips while his twin image on the other hand was sculling it down and getting it everywhere but in his mouth. Oh how different they were.

Upstairs Vergil was taking a nice long bath. After all he deserved it. I mean a hard day sitting and reading the newspaper and - oh yeah - trying to kick his brother's arse in everything had to be worth something right?

As he relaxed and soaked further into the water he started thinking. _Ahhh. It's so peaceful when I'm not near that time bomb of a brother. Makes me wonder, what happened to the days where you couldn't walk down a street due to all the demons? Now you could walk into the mouth of hell and find nothing! Where have all of those demon bastards gone? It's far too quiet to be careless. Hmmm... _There were footsteps at the door.

"Vergil! It's my turn to use the bathroom!"

_Dante again. When will that idiot ever learn? Now where was I? Ahh yes that's right. Far too quiet... There must be something going on. Then again they are stupid enough to have locked themselves in hell. They're probably looking for a way out now... I wonder... _This time Dante was thumping his fists on the door.

"Get your ass outa that tub now! Vergil don't make me come in there!"

"Fuck off! Can't you go piss outside?"

"I want a shower you bastard! Not a piss!"

"Then go use the kitchen sink!" And with that Vergil continued thinking, of course with the odd occasion of Dante banging on the door and yelling threats. Vergil closed his eyes. Hell was preparing...

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A/N: Hello everyone. This is my first fan fiction so don't be too harsh! I have a couple more ideas for the following chapters including Dante getting his hand stuck in Vergil's pet fish's bowl and a teapot (God knows what Sparda taught that boy) and Dante sitting for his licence. But for now enjoy!

Apheria: Wow that was fun! And kinda short...

Vergil: That was stupid.

Apheria: What is up with you and that word!

Dante: Look at me! I am having smarts!

Vergil: -draws Yamato-

R&R! Dankeschön!


	2. PMS, Marionettes and sticky notes

A/N: A BIG thankies to DarkRiku'sGirlfriend for being my first reviewer on this site ever! -hands pancake- this chapter is for you and my other friends who are not on this site but would like to see it! Keep reviewing ok! Three reviews will get a new chapter because there is no point in writing this fic if I can't share it and nobody wants to read it.

Warning: Some language (mostly English, heh just kidding) and maybe some grammar mistakes. If you see any please tell me. Thanks.

Disclaimer:

Apheria: I'm finally in possession of pancakes! Yay!

Vergil: -shifty eyes-

Apheria: Erm but unfortunately I have not concurred the world -YET- and therefore I do not own Devil May Cry... or Dante... Or Trish... Or Mundus and I thank god that I don't own Jester... There, I think that's it.

Vergil: Say it.

Apheria: -cries-

Vergil: Say IT!

Apheria: It?

Vergil: -draws Yamato-

Apheria -gulp- Fine. I don't own Vergil either.

The wonders of Saturday

By Apheria

Chapter two: P.M.S, Marionettes and sticky notes

It was a cold winter morning and Trish was in a right-royal shitty. She had woken up with a slight disturbance in her stomach and had locked herself in the bathroom for over an hour. In fact she had slammed the bathroom door right in Dante's nose when he had tried to comfort her and now he looked like Pinocchio with silver hair. The only difference was that Dante was a real boy. Or half of one at least.

"And STAY out!" was the last thing the Dante heard before the realisation that she had broken his nose set in.

"That's women for you little brother. Always slamming doors on the ones who annoy them the most."(1) Vergil walked into the hallway with amusement dancing all over his smirking face.

"Ha-ha. Bery funny Berge. It's not lige I bid anyfing wong! Geeze." Dante said although his speech was impaired by his nose. "Why is she so shitty anyway?"

Vergil took a while to register what his brother had just said but then finally replied "It's a girl thing."

Dante shrugged and went to go clean himself up for blood had run down onto his already red coat while Vergil relaxed and read the morning paper. Dante returned from cleaning his nose and was fully healed now. "Good thing about Sparda's blood I guess..." he muttered to himself as he lit the fire.

Ten minutes or so later Trish came storming down the hallway, yanked the paper out of Vergil's hands and waved her hand dismissively as angry protests came from behind her.

"Where the HELL is my coffee Dante? You know I need my morning fix!"

Dante was on the verge of cowering in fear. Sure he was a demon hunter, half devil, half human and besides that he could kick any demon that came within ten meters of him into outer space but even _HE_ was afraid of an angry Trish, I mean look at what she had just done to him!

"Ye - yes Sir! I - I mean ye - yes Trr - ish." Dante quickly made her coffee and then ran like hell back to his room leaving Vergil and Trish alone in silence.

Trish drank her coffee and read the stolen newspaper then stomped up to her room. Vergil heard whimpering coming from Dante's room.

"Verge. Ve - Verge. Can - can you come up here for a mi - minute?"

Vergil sighed in annoyance but just as he was about to protest Dante added "please?"

"What is it Dante?" Vergil muttered as he walked over to Dante. Dante quickly pushed Vergil inside and declared that he was holding a big meeting (consisting of two people) to try and make Trish anti-shitty.

"If you would just let me expla-" Vergil was cut off by the pacing steps of Dante. He turned to his brother.

"Maybe she ate some crab-apples ha! get it? crab-apples..." Vergil just glared, unamused. "Ok... maybe not crab-apples. What about aliens!"

"For fuck sake Dante! It's not frickn' crab-apples or aliens! Trish just has a simple dose of P.M.S!"

"P.M.S? What's that Verge?" Vergil slapped his forehead.

"It's the attitude women get when the have their period you idiot!"

"Period? Is Trish back at high school?" Vergil was about to draw his Yamato to silence the stupidity of his brother when there was a crash in the room of Devil May Cry.

"What the hell?" Dante and Vergil said in unison as they rushed out to the so called reception room. There were about thirty or so Marionettes piling through the doorway and about ten that were already in trying to trash the place.

"Oh no you don't you little shit!" Dante pulled out Ebony and Ivory and made one marionette that looked like it had an I.Q of negative fifty percent eat lead. Dante then proceeded to draw the Rebellion and brought it down on another marionette that was biting the pool table.

On the other side of the room Vergil was having a ball. The marionettes that even tried to get near Vergil were turned to firewood. In fact there was at least a meter radius where all there was were pieces of hacked up wood. Vergil looked over to Dante and saw that he had finished with all of the marionettes bar one. It was a Bloody Mary and it must of held something of importance if Dante hadn't already cleaned the floor with it.

"Hey Verge, look what this piece of kindling has for us." He handed Vergil a pink sticky note...

_To the damned kin of Sparda,_

_It is I the great Mundus. I have come to announce in this note that I will soon rule all things that you treasure! Yes. Tremble... I can taste the fear... By sundown in one week this unintelligible dimension will be mine! So prepare for your new God!_

Dante was looking over his brothers shoulder while trying to read it. "Why one week?" He looked back to where the Bloody Mary was _supposed _to be begging for it's life but it was gone. There was another piece of paper left though.

_P.S: I hear Trish is in a bit of a mood so I have put plans back a little._

It looked like there was something scribbled out but none of the twins could read it.

"What a fuckwit." Dante exclaimed.

"Wise though." Vergil said as he cleaned up the rest of the scattered wood demons. "Shit!"

"Hmm? What's your problem now Vergil?" Dante asked trying to get a better look at a kneeling Vergil.

"None of your business." he muttered.

Dante spied the splinter in Vergil's finger and laughed as he fuelled the dying fire with the remaining wood.

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(1): In this fic, Vergil is classed more as the older, more sophisticated brother and Dante more as the younger, less mature brother.

A/N: That was so fun... again! No Jester in this and very little Trish as well but they will have their parts to play all in due time!

Apheria: I'm so pleased at how this is turning out! -smiles-

Dante: Yeah I got to kick some ass this time!

Vergil: And if I'm not mistaken you also got your "ass" kicked as well little brother.

Dante: Grrr -sulks in a random corner-

Apheria: Err... On with the next chapter! And if anyone has ideas let me know in your reviews ok!

Dante: Run it's Trish!

Vergil: -throughs himself into the fire while Dante throughs himself into the trash compactor-

Trish: Ok...


	3. We're going where?

A/N: This was intended to be a Christmas fic but was a little delayed because of unforseen events on my behalf. Please excuse this.

Warning: **Strong church themes in here so if you are Christian some parts could/may offend you. If you are offended easily, do not read past this point. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.** Some language content. You know the drill.

Disclaimer: The only thing that I own in this fic is the story and the plot. However, I do not own the characters. They belong to Capcom.

Vergil and Dante: We don't belong to anyone!

Jester: You can belong to me you sexy little Devil boys. -licks his lips-

Vergil and Dante: Capcoms good.

The wonders of Saturday

By Apheria

Chapter three: We're going where?

A week had passed and Trish was back to normal. (Vergil thought Mundus _still _didn't have the guts to show up). The winter had gotten colder and Christmas was nearing. Although the city was as busy as it has ever been the Sparda residence on the other hand was dull. And I mean dull. The only movement was probably the quick flutter of the weekly newspaper in the breeze of the open window or Dante falling down the stairs. After the steady rhythm of Dante falling literally head over heals down the stairs he came to a crashing halt near the dining table. Trish came running out of her room in a dressing gown to see what the noise was about and when she saw Dante lying at the bottom of the stairs she muttered something like "for Sparda's sake" and went to help Dante.

Vergil, who had been woken up by the noise, stormed out of his room, looked around to see what had made it, saw Dante at the bottom of the stairs and mentally slapped his forehead. _And we're supposed to be twins. Twins... right._

"Ouch. My head... I'm hungry." Dante stood up and headed towards the kitchen. Trish gave a little huff of annoyance. Here she was worried that Dante had done something to hurt himself and it turns out he was just hungry. She didn't even receive a "thanks Trish" or "I'm okay" just an idiotic, "I'm hungry". _Bloody hybrids! Ungrateful spawn..._

So Dante plodded over to the kitchen and as he rounded the corner he saw the shiniest, biggest most flashiest and over decorated Christmas tree ever. Now Dante was the type to scream like a little girl and run up and start licking the tree... and that's exactly what he did, but anyway, that's beside the point. So _after_ he had finished his yearly ritual, he turned to Trish who was eyeing him like a nurse did when she was about to stick a huge syringe into someone.

"So... Can I have my presents? Huh? Pweeaaaaaseeeee!" Trish just looked at him and Vergil snarled.

"Wait a sec... How come Vergil has more presents than me? That's not fair!" Dante stuck his bottom lip out and pouted.

"Well Dante, do you remember what happened last year? You got more presents than Vergil and you acted like an ungrateful ass! So this year you both got the same."

"Look girly, I'm no mathematician," Vergil smirked at this remark, "... But _he's _got six presents. _SIX! _And I've only got four! By my count that's like... three more than me!" Dante shouted.

"Well Vergil and I decided you can have your other two presents after we attend church this year." Trish hardly finished the 'r' in year before the twins started to argue.

"WHAT!" They cried in unison.

"Well," Trish started, "I've decided we should attend church so you can both learn the true meaning of Christmas." she paused, "Right Verge?"

"Hahahahahaaaa... Fuck no."

"Yeah! They have like demon sensors in there! We'll _all _be fried alive!"

"You're both going. No "fucks" or excuses. _You're going._"

Dante took this into account. "That must mean you're going too."

"Yep."

Vergil looked at her like she was speaking an alien language. "You _do _realise you're a demon too."

"Yep."

"And you're not worried because...?"

She winked at the twins, "Now now. I'm a lady."

They both gave up. "She's finally cracked it. She's gone mental." Dante muttered in response.

"Fool. There's no way I'm going to church. No way." Vergil placed a hand on Yamato as if expecting a fight.

"Oh you'll go alright." She walked out to the little garage they had behind Devil May Cry, opened the back entrance door and there, sitting in the middle of the garage in all its glory was a brand new red motorbike.

"My precioussssss..." Dante went cross-eyed just looking at it.

"Merry Christmas Dante." Trish smiled at her masterpiece. "But conditions are you must go to church to get it."

"No." Dante whined, "I don't wana go!"

"You leave me no choice then." She walked up to the bike and slowly lowered her fingernail to the paintwork. Just ever so slowly so that Dante could get the picture. When nothing was said she scraped her nail down the side a little. She had got the reaction she wanted.

"NOOOO! Okay! Okay! I'll go!" Dante whimpered. "Just don't hurt it!"

"Hmpf. So you got Dante to go. Big deal. I won't be won over like the fool he is." Vergil crossed his arms in annoyance. "Nothing could get me to go. Nothing."

Trish just smiled. "We'll see..."

Trish took them back into the house, practically having to pry Dante away from his present, and lead them to her room. There she pulled out a little box and told Vergil to open it.

"... Jesus woman, wrap it up like damned Mundus is gon- Holy shit!"

Trish giggled and Dante was trying to see what had made Vergil react like he had. A smirk of pure evil crossed his face as he pulled out the other half of his amulet. Dante's half.

Dante reached for his neck. It was bare. How did Trish steal his amulet?

"What! You gave him _that_ for Christmas Trish! You _do _know if he gets that we wont be having another Christmas... EVER!"

Trish just put a finger to her lips and whispered in Dante's ear, "I know what I'm doing."

"You better... Or we're all dead."

The smile had now faded from Vergil's face. "So what. It's just an amulet. It's worthless to me."

"Oh it _is, _is it? Well then you won't mind if i take it then and give it back to it's owner then?" She snatched the amulet before Vergil could, but she didn't give it back to Dante just yet.

"Hm. See if I care." So Trish turned to Dante.

"Um. Sorry I stole it Dante. It's rightfully yours so well, here."

Vergil's eye twitched, "Fine! Fine! It's mine though. I'll go to fucking church then! But the amulet's _mine._" The last part of mine almost sounded like a hiss. Obsessive.

"Come on Verge, how bad can church be anyway?" Dante added to the following silence.

It was settled. On the following Sunday they would go to church. Much to the twins dislike.

The dreaded Sunday came around much faster than the twins had expected, or wanted. Trish rounded them both into the car, which was hard work considering they're the sons of Sparda, and although she was getting them to go to church, she could not get them to change their clothes. Even that was too much of a task for her.

When they found the parks they got out of the car. Many people were giving confused looks at Dante and especially Vergil, for he was equipped with Yamato. (Trish had convinced Dante to leave his weapons at home but trying to make Vergil do the same had turned into mission impossible). The twins, for the first time in their life, looked positively nervous. Dante was sweating like he was in a sauna and Vergil was acting paranoid and doing the whole "lets shoot quick glances everywhere in case someone tries to kill me with a crucifix" look. Trish walked up to a couple dressed in deep blue and black. They either seemed to know her or they were just acting friendly.

"Good morning Sarah, Rob. How are you?" She bowed respectively to the man and woman.

"Oh hello Patricia! Long time no see!"

Dante giggled "Hehehe... Patricia..."

"You're an idiot." Vergil didn't see the joke.

Once Trish or "Patricia" had finished talking to her friends she and the twins moved into the church to find a seat. Just as things were going smoothly (and people had stopped looking at them weirdly because it seemed that they knew someone) they walked through the door.

"Gah! My feet burn! Help!" The soles of Dante's shoes where scorched and the church smelt like rubber. The same happened to Vergil. He shot a menacing glare at Trish.

"New boots better be under that damn tree or you're dead."

She gulped, "I'll find you something. I hope..."

When they had taken their seats, a few renewed looks and burnt soles later, the church had calmed down. Then the Priest came out.

(A/N: Bare with me here I don't know what happens ok? I don't go to church so sue me.)

"Welcome everyone here today. We all know that next Sunday is Christmas, the wonderful time to celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ."

"Jesus Christ is right..." Vergil muttered under his breath.

The Priest continued, "Now today's Reading comes from a magazine I found in a hedge..."

Loud snoring erupted from where Dante was sitting.

Trish nudged Dante, "Wake up. Dante wake up!"

"Huh? Oh yeah. What's happening?"

"The Priest just finished the Reading."

"The wha?"

"... Never mind."

"Alright then."

The Priest then put the magazine down and returned to the front of the Church. "Now the time has come to rid our souls of our sins. Please come forth anyone who would like to confess anything."

Dante was the first to sand up. Trish sank lower into her seat. _I have just made the biggest mistake of my life..._

"Yes young man, what would you like to confess?"

Dante seemed a bit nervous, "Um well... I had a really great imagination once... but I sold it for pizza..." Everyone sighed sympathetically.

"May God watch over you young man. Thank you for sharing that with us." He looked out to everyone again, "Anyone else?"

Vergil then stood up. Trish sank lower. _Please not Vergil..._

"And you sir?"

Vergil snorted, "I tried to kill this idiot next to me."

The Priest looked at Vergil, "That's nothing to confess, you're doing God a favour." He turned back to the crowd. "If there are no more confessions, let us get on with the cleansing."

Dante and Vergil looked at each other, "Cleansing?"

"I'm not liking this Verge."

"Neither."

The Priest brought a cross from his robes and walked down the isle. "Now all of Satan's spawn be gone!"

Dante burst into flames and Vergil's Yamato broke in half. At that Very moment, a small hole appeared in the church floor and got bigger... and bigger... The Jester's ugly head popped through.

"We've made it! Muahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa!" Then he placed a hand on the church floorboards and they burnt a hole right through his hand.

"OW OW OW OW OW! Damn this miscalculation! Master won't be affected by this human building though!" Then he spied Vergil and Dante, "OoOoOoOoOoh! The sexy little devil boys are here too! It's Jester's lucky day!"

At that point, Mundus's head poked through the hole in the floor and pointed at Dante. "You!" With a sudden crack, the floorboards gave way and Jester and Mundus were left clinging to the edge of the tunnel. Dante ran up to the hole and noticing he had no weapons, he pulls off one of his boots and throws it at Mundus. Lucky for Mundus, Dante has a really bad aim and instead of hitting Mundus, it hit Jester in the face making him lose his grip and sending him all the way back to hell. Dante then ripped off his other boot, leaving him bootless and burning his feet, and threw it at Mundus's eyes. This time it reached it's target and Mundus followed after Jester. The boot then rebounded and hit Dante back in the head. What a graceful way to win against the Prince of darkness and his sidekick.

"I'll be baaaaaaaaaaaack!" Mundus's voice echoed all over the church.

"Yeah. And so will we." Dante exclaimed.

When church was over, the Priest actually said thank you to the Devil twins and gave them both a mini-crucifix to keep them safe. Dante promptly dropped it accidentally, for the crucifix burnt him, into the church proceeds jar and when he went to retrieve it got his hand stuck in the jar.

Vergil was muttering profanities at Dante and Trish had to give a cheque to the Priest for the amount of money Dante had become stuck to.

When they were in the car, it was Vergil who broke the silence. "So... When can I have my amulet?"

Trish looked at him though the rear view mirror. "You better ask Dante. It _is _his amulet after all."

"TRISH!"

To be continued...

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Thanks a lot to every one who reads and pancakes for every one who reviews! Come on guys! Lots of people are reading this but only a few are reviewing! Remember 3 reviews gets a new chapter! I'm thinking of putting it up too.

Notes: This fic is going up to a "m" rating because of all the swearing. I hope ya'll don't mind now!

Dante and Vergil: -opening presents-

Dante: Yeah! I got a new coat! Thanks Verge!

Vergil: Sure...

Dante: -Hands present to Vergil-

Vergil: New hair gel... alright! Hey and it's the best brand, Spiky Locks... -silence- This stuff costs a fortune... What did you do to it?

Dante: Nothing Verge! Come on! It's Christmas after all.

Vergil: ... -puts in hair and his hands get stuck to his head. If looks could kill Dante would be six feet under and still going-

Dante: MUAHAHAHA! Try kicking my ass like that!

Trish: Heh it's like a really bad version of heads, shoulders, knees and toes.

Dante: -Pulls out a camera- Merry Christmas Verge!


End file.
